I sought Space
Often we place a barrier of not having sufficient ‘time’. Before I left London I began to notice new experiences of time when I was teaching: as though time suspended into a new time reality and my classes were forever yet no time had passed within the 60 minute period. I enjoyed this new sense of time as easy and peaceful.
The expansive space I was feeling was my larger self that sits outside of time and the physical self. It was the place where quantum physics collides with the spiritual realm. Time ceased to be relevant because there is only the present moment to experience, and when you are truly in the present moment there is no construct of too little or too much time. It is like the scene at the end of The Matrix when Neo learns to see the bullets and dodge them – he is so slow that he is beyond speed of recognition.
I often found my yoga nidras included an element of space and expansion. I found so many people I work with limit themselves to their physical reality and experience, with a linear construct of time. Through the experience of expansion you release the sensation of time and your busy physical body; space arises for all to have its time with ease.
Through finding space in London I realised that I needed to travel to expand into my space.
Grace was seeking me
As a child I feared expansion and the concept of the ever expanding universe. I did not feel safe, grounded or connected to earth as a physical being. I was in fear of space and what it would bring.
In 2015 I was given a book by a client for Christmas “Sh*t Happens, Magic Follows” by Carmen Harris who’s work is called “Space for Grace”. Her book was so inspiring that I went to see for energy healing throughout the year. In Nicaragua I worked with Grace van Berkum and noticed similarities of her to my mother, Grace (known as Gaie): I realised that I was surrounded by grace.
In seeking my space I had welcomed what had been seeking me – grace. Grace had been seeking me for over a year.
What is Grace?
As someone who grew up dancing, Grace was a “smooth and elegant movement”. To my mum’s religious upbringing Grace was “unmerited favour by the divine”.
I sought change. To remove my conditioning and patterns of behaviour that limited my recovery. To fully alleviate my suffering from my trauma and truly heal. I sought freedom away from the mirror of my past self. To hear my true nature and follow her. This created my space.
As I explained meditation breathing to a group of ‘Ageing Gracefully’ clients I advised them to look at their meditation and yoga practice through the eyes of ‘childlike wonder’. Yet, ‘childlike wonder‘ is considered an act by the grace of god to remind us of our true nature.
A child stands outside of time, time is ever expanding to them as they have no experience of its construct. There is no concept of cause and effect as they see things unfold with no expectation or linear thought. A child is innocent and without desire.
Often it is our desires that cause us suffering. We seek the time when our desire is met so we perceived that we lack, and so we suffer in the longing of that which we do not have. Without desire we cannot suffer. For me, Grace is “deliverance from suffering”. When we welcome gifts of the unknown through ease and love.
Space for Grace
A head injury is all about grounding. You need to know where your feet are on earth to allow full ease of your physical self and worth of life. Then you can embrace with full compassion the unconditional love for all of your being. This allows you to explore the more spiritual aspects of the self. Head injury or not we all deserve to enjoy this discovery in our life.
Space for grace is like falling in love: you jump in with both feet with faith that it will light you up for life.
You are close to finding space for grace when you feel like:
- You are never rushed
- You breathe slowly and calmly regardless of the situation
- You make clear decisions
- You can hear your inner voice or gut feeling with a giant leaping ‘YES!’
- You cease imagining your future or small imposed images of your life
- You relinquish effort
- You cease being controlled by rational thought
- You find yourself in the space between your thoughts
Grace is effortless. It is a gift from the deep unconditional love within yourself for transformation. When we fully surrender to love and relinquish control then grace will enter. You receive what you need with love like never-ending gifts. When grace enters it takes you to a life beyond all your wildest imagination, manifests tranquility and timelessness.
“When you create space for grace it is the journey of the soul home.”